The Sports Page - NBA

Last night, the Yuba Foons were eliminated from the National Badminton Association playoffs with a loss to their arch rivals, the Rapid City Sloths. The Sloths won the series 4 games to 2 and will now advance to the NBA finals. The Foons, named for Yuba founder Joe Foon, are the only professional sports team remaining in Yuba and their loss has ended another year's hopes of bringing a championship back to the town.

After three straight losses in the series, Match 6 seemed within grasp for the Foons until play actually started and the Sloths won every point. In fact, the Sloths opening serve completely silenced the Yuba crowd's chants of "YU-BA-FOONS", and most of the bleachers had emptied before the point ended. Making matters worse, the entire Foon squad was ejected midway through the match for applying pine tar to the birdie. Following the ejections, the team received numerous delay-of-game violations when no one served. These violations persisted until the umpire called the match for lack of light.

Lifelong badminton fan and regular Yuba Post contributor Jeff Richardson was reportedly so disgusted with the loss that he vowed to give up watching the NBA completely. It should be noted, however, that this is the same thing he said after last season, and also after the eleven out of twelve seasons before that when his team didn't win the title.