The Yuba Post seeks feline columnist for its online newspaper.
-Experience a must.
-Position requires a minimum of two columns per month.
-Desired applicant will be curmudgeonly yet likable, possess a natural wit for cat puns, and be extremely photogenic and visually appealing.
-The Yuba Post reserves the right to disrupt naps if deadlines are approaching.
-Position is unpaid but has great benefits, including water, dry food pellets, plastic balls with bells inside of them, and constant tummy-rubbing.
-Traditional domestic cats preferred, but non-human-consuming lions and tigers will be considered.
-Those not litter trained need not apply.
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2 comments:
I for one would like to protest the Yuba Post’s discriminatory hiring practices. Your insistence on hiring another of those despicable felines clearly stems from some form of anti-canine feelings. After the first cat clearly didn’t live up to expectations, quitting without even a two weeks notice, the Yuba Post just goes ahead and looks for another cat. While I can’t meet all of the above requirements, the ones I fall short on were clearly designed to keep myself and fellow canines from applying. The Yuba Post will soon be hearing from my lawyer. We will see if a lawsuit will wake the editors of The Yuba Post up to the fact that discriminatory actions such as this went out of style with the old “Jim Crow” laws of the South.
P.S. Nothing is more photogenic than a puppy!
Point taken, Puppies Rock. Unfortunately, however, the position has already been filled by Sammy the Evil Cat.
You could file a complaint in the Complaint Section, except we removed that section after someone complained about it.
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